Seeing you and her for the first time
Now that made me sick.
I watched as you talked to her those sweet words or was it just jackshit?
Both your eyes locked and I felt miserable.
Shifting uncomfortably for what seemed like an age
as you fondled with that thing of hers that you call hair.
Biting my lip as I ordered my tears to stay put,
I wasn't gonna show no one what I thought.
I hate putting on this pokerface of mine
cos at times, it's just so hard to pull off.
I know you two will be over soon
cos hey! what, nowadays, lasts more than a blue moon?
So why are these tears coming down?
Why is this heart so run down?
Fucking hell, why on earth is it so hard to THINK nowadays without at first thinking of you?
I don't like the idea of you and her together
as she is just out to try and get her hands on whatever is possible.
She isn't the most nicest person ever
and no, she doesn't have a heart of gold.
What she has though, that I wish could be mine,
is that thing you call a heart...
you know, that's big and red and shines in the dark.
I don't think I've said this enough but I declare it at the top of my lungs:
"I love you, I love you, I love you, maybe even until the end of time."
I thought I was over you and planned to kick you in the balls
Instead I fell deeper in this thing they all call love,
the weirdest bit being exactly five minutes after I posted that last blog.
I'm sorry for not being pretty enough,
I'm sorry for not capturing your heart.
I'm sorry for not being game enough,
I'm sorry for being such a tard.
I think God was having a tough day the day He made me
and maybe wasn't feeling generous enough?
Instead of giving me the looks,
he gave me this overenthusiastically loving heart.
No, I'm not proud of it, at times
And no, I'm not trying to rhyme.
I guess it'll never work between me and you
and I guess I'm over crying all those tears.
So please go and love some place else
because PDA's just as well
kill my heart and destroy my soul,
cos living in a world that revolves around you,
is like asking for the kill.
And then I see you round the bend,
you turn and stare at me straight through the lens.
As my heart thumps energetically in its ribcage,
I turn to see who else but that girl standing next to me.
I feel like crying, I feel like letting off at the top of my lungs.
I really do wish I was that girl,
you know, the one that responds to your ear-to-ear grin. I guess she makes you happy. Well good for you.
My heart raced that fast it was just about to EXXXXXPLOOOODDEEEEE!!!
*NB: This isn't a poem. This isn't/wasn't meant to rhyme. Just how I feel at the moment, that is, shit. Haha.
Okay goodnight,
- Steph
xoxo
is it about someone i know?? =P
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